Fathers Day gifts for complete assholes Vol. 1. Note the fragmented guitar print on either sleeve. Fuck. RIP Slayer.
"YAH HALLO I CAN MAKE HANNEMAN MEMORIAL SHIRT FOR YOU. DOES NOT MATTER IF KERRY KING IS STRICTLY SLAYER CELEBRATE."
This Daemon longsleeve is one of the holy grails of shite metal shirts for a few reasons. The back print is completely asinine and there aren’t enough numbers for a proper phone number.
Overall it perfectly encapsulates the forgettable rubbish that Death Metal eventually trickled into to. The ancestral parent of all dumb trucker-chic Swedish metal merch today.
Almost. You’re just *this* close to being a hulking, powerlifting, gasmasked übermensch. But no. Now you’ll never get a taste of supremacy because of your inferion back print.
Look at this closely.
The worlds saddest band still can’t even properly execute the already quarter-baked ideas in their tired heads.
This is embarrassing, but at least they’re *consistently* embarrassing.
I love Brodequin, total power lifting death metal brutality.
I’m going to ignore Brodequin’s unclear use of language here (finger nails?), and just focus my mental clarity to pin point perfection with the mantra of driving the nails into Christ’s shivering wreck of a body REALLY FUCKING HARD BRO’ whilst i’m working out.
Remember to seek a physician’s advice before engaging in any fitness activity that may require listening to Instruments of Torture to get the job done.
"Do you even lift bro?"
Seriously, the only reason these are in Metal is Awful is because they aren’t fucking Brodequin gym shorts.
I need Brodequin gym shorts for when i’m bunch pressing scene posers during free weights.
PS “Shorts come with Left and Right side pockets ideal for carrying keys and small change”